by Peter Kadwell

Thousands of men and women in Australia have had to come to terms with the discovery that they are attracted to someone of the same sex. For many, it may be a new discovery or something that they have known for years but felt uncomfortable about openly acknowledging. It can happen at any stage in life, but the older you are and the longer you have been living a straight life, the more challenging it is to come out as a gay man or lesbian. It is not a simple process and you will almost certainly experience some difficulties, but there are many sources of advice and support that you can use.

Coming out as someone attracted to the same sex does not mean your old life was wrong or fake, or that the ‘old you’ requires changing. However, you may want to make changes, to overhaul your life completely. Whatever choices you make, people who love and respect you should love and respect you both as the person you are now becoming, and as the person you have always been.

What is the best way to tell other people, including family and friends that you might be gay? This is never easy. Searching for the right time and place to tell them can be almost as hard as actually telling them. However and when and why will vary from person to person, and will be different with each person told, but the important thing to remember is that you don’t have to go it alone. Again, I want to remind each man that there is a community of men who understand something of the experience, each from his own perspective, who are there to provide support and companionship. There are a range of support people listed on our website or : contact us directly.


  1. Ben W
    September 22, 2016 @ 8:50 pm

    Hi my name is Ben
    Been thinking about comings out for
    a few years
    Go to saunas all the time have been
    with loads of men
    Hope to talk soon


    • spbloom
      October 10, 2016 @ 9:49 pm

      Hi Ben,
      Feel free to contact our support hotline if you want to have a chat. You are also welcome to our support sessions held on the first and third Wednesday of every month. There is also a new online forum at that offers remote support and online discussions.

      Regards and thanks


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